Top 5 List for Zombies -Finding Your Next Meal

Greetings Fellow Cyber Travelers!
 
It feels like ages since my last post- been tied up pubbing my novel. But here we are once again at the good ole blog. So let’s get started.
 
This list is for zombie eyes only…So no peeking humans. Today’s top five list is tactics that seasoned zombies have adapted in securing a meal.

This list is brought to you by Zom-Plant, a limb donation center for zombies that have sustained damage to a limb or two.  No  zombie limb left behind!

After interviewing several zombies they were quoted as saying “Rrrrh,” “Hhhhaarrrrr,” and “Eeeehhhh.” Unfortunately, I do not speak their native tongue, so I did a few walk-alongs with some experienced zombies to observe their tactics. Below are a top 5 list of these tactics:

1. Be Sneaky:
While with Billy—a once mechanic at Spiffy Oil—I observed him roaming around in a supermarket. Billy is the quiet type. He shuffled through the store, almost unnoticeable until you laid eyes on him. It went on like this for days. Finally a man entered the store. Billy didn’t race after his prey—instead he soundlessly shuffled along tailing the ravenous human clearing what little remained on the shelves. Then, just as the man was celebrating his triumphant find with a rare bottle of cheap whiskey, Billy sunk his rotting teeth into the human’s shoulder. Being quiet and sneaky can certainly work to the advantage of the walking dead.

2. Listen for Sounds:
Philippe was a zombie that I came across in an abandoned part of town. This area was in terrible disarray, looking as if humans and zombies had ditched the deserted area. I stuck with Philippe for a week and he would shamble around, between buildings and alleyways. Until one day, he heard a glass bottle roll across the ground on the side of a nearby building. Now, I thought that it was a rat or other rodent, but I followed Philippe anyway. He quietly shuffled around the corner of the building and discovered a human. As soon as he laid eyes on the living creature, Philippe broke into a sprint and captured his meal for the day. So, zombies- take stock in what Philippe had to teach and listen
for those sounds and don’t be afraid to investigate them.

3. Follow, Follow:
Not all zombies are fast. It’s okay. If you are of the slower variety, fret not my undead friend. I met Vanessa a few weeks ago and this living dead girl does not have speed on her side, but she does have two virtues on her side: instinct and persistence. A group of four survivors, were traveling up the road and passed right by Vanessa. Obviously they discounted her as a non-treat due to her speed—or rather lack there of. The group of men continued on foot and soon disappeared in the distance. Several hours later, in the wee hours of the morning, Vanessa was still on the trail of the men that had passed her. She stumbled toward their camp where three unsuspecting victims slumbered. The sound of a  twig snapping drew her attention away from the sleepers. She followed the sound, which was backed up by crunching leaves. She came up on the fourth man, just as he was zipping up his pants. Poor guy, never saw it coming. Following humans—in Vanessa’s case led to her next meal.

4. Pick off the Slowest:
I met Ginny, near a department store. She would stalk her prey, which typically traveled in herds of six to ten people—far too many for her to take on alone. She would eye them from afar, then when they began to separate—and they always would, she would make her move. She’d pick the slowest,
and follow it to the most opportune places, then launch her attack. It worked every time for Ginny.

5. Join the Horde:
Sometimes you just have to know when to go at it alone and when to join a group of other zombies. There are times, when you want to attack a whole group of people, and you simply can’t do it on your own. Joining the horde is an option for just this type of circumstance. I met Zeb about a month ago. He wanted to launch an attack on what used to be his group of survivors—when he was human. But in his undead state, he didn’t have a chance. So, he joined the horde. They invaded the camp after dark and well—let’s just say that there are some new members of the horde now. Afterward, Zeb left the horde to do things solo, but he knows that the horde will be there if he decides to come back.

Well zombies, that’s it for now. These tips should get you started, but overall follow your undead instincts. Good Luck & stay zombie-fied. Jeannie Rae out.

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